I hate to say it ahitche1 but if the card was in your name than you are the only person responsable for paying that debt off. It seems you only have two options here:
1. make a payment arrangement with them that you can afford just in case your dad can't make payments on this.
2. let it get charged off and probably sent to a collection agency. It will remain on your credit for atleast 7 years and badly damage your credit.
I'm sorry to hear that your dad got you into this mess and if he won't take responsability for his actions I hope you have the financial capability to take care of it for him(and you!)
Hi ahitche1
I think all that you need to do now is to contact your CA and agree for a repayment plan which you find suitable for you. Try to come to a PDL agreement so that soon after you pay the amount the listing gets deleted from your credit report. But if you do not pay it, it will stay in your report for 7 years as cbass pointed and will adversely affect your score.
That sounds like the best advice Morningstar. If she really had no connection with this card then why should she be responsible. Now if she got the card for him and knew he would be using it then it would be her responsibility since the risk was there when she opened it. If that is the fact maybe small claims court could help.
I don't think that you have a chance at this point, you will be responsible for it. If you had filed a police report 4 years ago when you first found out it was missing or not in you possession, then you may have a chance of getting it overturn. But 4 years, I would think that the only way you will get this straightened out is to file a suit against your father. This will prbably create a strain on your relationship with your dad.
That is true but there should be a SOL for that too. The father wasn't worried about the strain when he did this. I think it was very unfair to put this on his childs plate.
You would think that companies would check this crap out. I know people who run up utility bills in there kids names and then not pay them and it screws the kids credit before they even get started in life.
The original poster did not give alot of particulars. He didn't say if his dad just used the CC without his knowledge or that he knew the dad was using it and then dad didn't pay.
Very stressful. My aunt took advantage of my grandma's ill health and depleted her bank account of 30-40k. Once the other siblings got word, they told my grandma and my aunt was written out of her will. This made for very, very awkward situations in our family with tons of stress. I can't even hardly say my aunts name anymore. Now 15 years later, the siblings all still love their sister, they have lost all respect.
She did this to herself Lorri. You may or may not feel bad but she should. surely she was being greedy in taking anything at all but that amount makes it worse. Imagine how long someone mtook to save that/ !5 years of mistrust isn't enough. I say she earned herself a lifetime.
What did she do with the money? Was she in a predicament that she needed the money for something or was it just greed. We never know what motivates people to do what they do.
If you were referring to my situation (where my aunt ripped off her mom--my grandma). She was living with my grandma, not working and took the money and used it for drugs, gambling, whatever she felt like using it for. If you were to know her you would see that she fits the profile of someone who would be low enough to do something like that.
I would imagine my aunt lives her own private hell everyday (as she should) knowing what she did to her mother. Now her mother is dead and gone and she can never change what she did.
Some people feel entitled to money in a situation like that, they justify it anyway they can. Hopefully she has learned a lesson and will not do it again. It is a shame when we see somebody so helpless about their habits that they will take advantage of loved ones to get their fix, weather it be gambling, drugs or other poison. It happens everyday in one form or another unfortunately.
There are so many people these days with that same character. She should feel ashamed but chances are if she is on drugs she probaly doesn't. I have had to be around people who do drugs every now and again and I will tell ya one thing as soon as a drug enters their system they start thinking they are entitled and bulletproof. Your best bet is just to try your best to avoid these types of people.
Sometimes you can not avoid them if they are your family members, you can only pray that they find something in life that they value more than the drugs and become drug free. Addiction is a powerful monster, I think what the person don't understand is when they are addicted that they are not the only ones affected by the problems that come out of the whole situation. Family and friends suffer in one way or another also.
So much truth to your last statements erb. I guess I understand that it is an addiction but I also feel that the person is a bit selfish. If you have ever been around an addict you would see my point. It is always all about them or how the whole world let them down. Just once step up to the plate and admit your failure instead of pinning it on the whole dang world.
Yes erb, I agree with you, but if you do not complain against your family member when your identity is misused by them, you will have to pay off all the debt since you will be held responsible for the debt and your credit report may have negative listings which will adversely affect your score. So you need to inform the credit bureaus of your identity theft and set fraud alert services with them.
I will say one thing I have had family members take advantage of me in the past. Never stole my identity but would talk me into paying things for them and I would never see it back. My brother was a good one (practically a pro) at this. I finally just had enough and told him I couldn't support him. It is rough to speak up but it is rougher trying to be responsible for debts that aren't your own.
The good thing is that they still have a relationship with her, I am sure that she is not proud of what she done, and what she lost is not worth any amount of money in the world. She just needs to work on it, day by day.
I agree erb, I see people everyday at work who have it all one day and then lose it because of a bad decision, like drinking and driving. You just never know.
Oh don't think I don't know what it is like to have to beg and borrow. Been there recently myself. Even hit a point where I couldn't repay. I have since then but since I have a good trusting relationship with these family members and have helped them out alot in the past it wasn't a trust issue. The thing that made me feel the worst is having them know my business and having to actually ask. That makes a person feel pretty low.
I would help any person in my family out if it was just one stupid decision and not always a repeat. I have a bro that is like this. I got tired of hearing "i'll give that back to you next time I get paid and then payday he gives it to the local tavern instead".
hate to say it but i would think that you could have took him to small claims court if it was like right after it happened but im not sure what the statues of limitations are for these types of things but ultimately, you are responsible.
I don't think there is any statute of limitations on something like this, I mean he was not aware that this was going on. I would at least attempt it. How is the relationship with the father now?
Sometimes a judge will look down on something you knew about for say a few years and did nothing about. Any case it is worth going and getting something done. Not only this if the creditor is still owed you will have a verdict to show that you were not responsible for the debt and it could even help getting your credit report straightened around.
I can understand why a judge would not look favorably on something like this. I mean if the person knew about this for several years and did nothing about it, whats the big hurry now?
I hate to say it ahitche1 but if the card was in your name than you are the only person responsable for paying that debt off. It seems you only have two options here:
1. make a payment arrangement with them that you can afford just in case your dad can't make payments on this.
2. let it get charged off and probably sent to a collection agency. It will remain on your credit for atleast 7 years and badly damage your credit.
I'm sorry to hear that your dad got you into this mess and if he won't take responsability for his actions I hope you have the financial capability to take care of it for him(and you!)
Best of luck
Hi ahitche1
I think all that you need to do now is to contact your CA and agree for a repayment plan which you find suitable for you. Try to come to a PDL agreement so that soon after you pay the amount the listing gets deleted from your credit report. But if you do not pay it, it will stay in your report for 7 years as cbass pointed and will adversely affect your score.
File an identity theft report with your local police department, and contact the FTC.
If you do not want your father to get in trouble, then you need to pay it.
That sounds like the best advice Morningstar. If she really had no connection with this card then why should she be responsible. Now if she got the card for him and knew he would be using it then it would be her responsibility since the risk was there when she opened it. If that is the fact maybe small claims court could help.
I don't think that you have a chance at this point, you will be responsible for it. If you had filed a police report 4 years ago when you first found out it was missing or not in you possession, then you may have a chance of getting it overturn. But 4 years, I would think that the only way you will get this straightened out is to file a suit against your father. This will prbably create a strain on your relationship with your dad.
That is true but there should be a SOL for that too. The father wasn't worried about the strain when he did this. I think it was very unfair to put this on his childs plate.
You would think that companies would check this crap out. I know people who run up utility bills in there kids names and then not pay them and it screws the kids credit before they even get started in life.
This is not a civil matter, this is a criminal matter.
Sounds like a touch of identity theft, even if the two are related the father stole her identity and used the card right?
The original poster did not give alot of particulars. He didn't say if his dad just used the CC without his knowledge or that he knew the dad was using it and then dad didn't pay.
Thats what I was trying to figure out. Maybe the OP will fill in the blanks.
It would be nice if the OP would come back?????
Yes it would. I think her situation is sad. How stressful to have a family memeber do this.
Very stressful. My aunt took advantage of my grandma's ill health and depleted her bank account of 30-40k. Once the other siblings got word, they told my grandma and my aunt was written out of her will. This made for very, very awkward situations in our family with tons of stress. I can't even hardly say my aunts name anymore. Now 15 years later, the siblings all still love their sister, they have lost all respect.
She did this to herself Lorri. You may or may not feel bad but she should. surely she was being greedy in taking anything at all but that amount makes it worse. Imagine how long someone mtook to save that/ !5 years of mistrust isn't enough. I say she earned herself a lifetime.
What did she do with the money? Was she in a predicament that she needed the money for something or was it just greed. We never know what motivates people to do what they do.
I think it was her dad that ran up the card. That is if I am reading correctly.
If you were referring to my situation (where my aunt ripped off her mom--my grandma). She was living with my grandma, not working and took the money and used it for drugs, gambling, whatever she felt like using it for. If you were to know her you would see that she fits the profile of someone who would be low enough to do something like that.
I would imagine my aunt lives her own private hell everyday (as she should) knowing what she did to her mother. Now her mother is dead and gone and she can never change what she did.
Some people feel entitled to money in a situation like that, they justify it anyway they can. Hopefully she has learned a lesson and will not do it again. It is a shame when we see somebody so helpless about their habits that they will take advantage of loved ones to get their fix, weather it be gambling, drugs or other poison. It happens everyday in one form or another unfortunately.
There are so many people these days with that same character. She should feel ashamed but chances are if she is on drugs she probaly doesn't. I have had to be around people who do drugs every now and again and I will tell ya one thing as soon as a drug enters their system they start thinking they are entitled and bulletproof. Your best bet is just to try your best to avoid these types of people.
Sometimes you can not avoid them if they are your family members, you can only pray that they find something in life that they value more than the drugs and become drug free. Addiction is a powerful monster, I think what the person don't understand is when they are addicted that they are not the only ones affected by the problems that come out of the whole situation. Family and friends suffer in one way or another also.
So much truth to your last statements erb. I guess I understand that it is an addiction but I also feel that the person is a bit selfish. If you have ever been around an addict you would see my point. It is always all about them or how the whole world let them down. Just once step up to the plate and admit your failure instead of pinning it on the whole dang world.
Yes erb, I agree with you, but if you do not complain against your family member when your identity is misused by them, you will have to pay off all the debt since you will be held responsible for the debt and your credit report may have negative listings which will adversely affect your score. So you need to inform the credit bureaus of your identity theft and set fraud alert services with them.
I will say one thing I have had family members take advantage of me in the past. Never stole my identity but would talk me into paying things for them and I would never see it back. My brother was a good one (practically a pro) at this. I finally just had enough and told him I couldn't support him. It is rough to speak up but it is rougher trying to be responsible for debts that aren't your own.
The good thing is that they still have a relationship with her, I am sure that she is not proud of what she done, and what she lost is not worth any amount of money in the world. She just needs to work on it, day by day.
This is true. I don't think they should give up on her but maybe just proceed with caution a little more in the future.
It actually could be anyone of us tommorro, becareful, especially if you don't really know what she was going through at the time.
I agree erb, I see people everyday at work who have it all one day and then lose it because of a bad decision, like drinking and driving. You just never know.
Oh don't think I don't know what it is like to have to beg and borrow. Been there recently myself. Even hit a point where I couldn't repay. I have since then but since I have a good trusting relationship with these family members and have helped them out alot in the past it wasn't a trust issue. The thing that made me feel the worst is having them know my business and having to actually ask. That makes a person feel pretty low.
I would help any person in my family out if it was just one stupid decision and not always a repeat. I have a bro that is like this. I got tired of hearing "i'll give that back to you next time I get paid and then payday he gives it to the local tavern instead".
hate to say it but i would think that you could have took him to small claims court if it was like right after it happened but im not sure what the statues of limitations are for these types of things but ultimately, you are responsible.
I don't think there is any statute of limitations on something like this, I mean he was not aware that this was going on. I would at least attempt it. How is the relationship with the father now?
Sometimes a judge will look down on something you knew about for say a few years and did nothing about. Any case it is worth going and getting something done. Not only this if the creditor is still owed you will have a verdict to show that you were not responsible for the debt and it could even help getting your credit report straightened around.
I can understand why a judge would not look favorably on something like this. I mean if the person knew about this for several years and did nothing about it, whats the big hurry now?
That what I think we all are wondering.